Just can't let it go

Today I learned that the most sensitive depths of ones tolerance can be put to the test in the addition of a previously unknown truth about someone. As human beings, we're all prone to negative thoughts in our imminent prejudgements towards other human beings, but the determining factor in ones level of tolerance actually relies on whether one can refrain from expressing those thoughts. After all, tolerance in modern society seems to mean only that one can pretend to enjoy someones company even after finding out something potentially displeasing to him/her. It's the ability to control ones expression of emotion, which goes beyond the subject of tolerance, but ties in on the visual scale, which is all people really care about. It may not be a dictionary definition, but it's apparent EYE-ARR-ELLE. If you think about it, it really is.

Today I learned that I'm not a very tolerant person.

We had our first school assembly today after B Block, and like pretty much every grade 12 who is not a link leader and/or a loser, I high-tailed along with Michelle, Anthony, and Dickson as soon as we were allowed to quietly march in uniform steps to the gymnasium for slaughter by boredon. We walked over to Starbucks under the peculiarly nice weather and sat 'round a round table to bring forth insightful and heartfelt conversations on life. Like most subjects we encountered in our dialogue, Anthony recited to the last detail on each of his groundbreaking ideas on our futures after graduation. Michelle and Dickson remained quiet the whole time and I, as always, argued heatedly against Anthony after every opinion he stated. A part of our conversation went something like this:

Jamie: Geez I bet you're also the only person who's gonna move out right away too. Why would you want to move in with your brother anyway?

Anthony: Well... why not? I get away from my parents, and it's cheap since I just share the rent with my brother.

Jamie: Because there's no reason for you to move out! Why do you need to get away from your parents anyways? It's not like you don't go home to them every day right now. There's nothing wrong with them. =/

Anthony: Actually, the thing about them is... They say that it would be awkward for me to have sex at their house.

And the shit hits the fan.

The overall reaction at our table to that statement seemed to happen in slow-motion, like one of those Lotto 6/49 ads on TV. I felt the skin around my eyelids stretch as they grew to 20x their normal size. My jaw ached as a cement block took its place and fell with a thud onto the tiles. I saw Michelle awaken from her social slumber as she rose to look in the very moment when Dickson's face scrunched into a paper ball as he burst out laughing. It cued my laughter as well, but it seemed to happen in half-time, as if nothing this funny has ever come along in my lifetime, and it was a moment to be lived slowly. Jackpot. It really did feel like winning the lottery.

Up to this point, one may imagine this as a complete overkill of a reaction to a seemingly-reasonable response. But one would only think that if he/she possessed virgin eyes to Anthony's face and stature. Just saying, he looks like Gretchen from Recess or upon closer inspection, his face is like a banana. It was the way the shock of it hit me: A guy like Anthony talking about this as if he expects to be an expert with the ladies by graduation. Yup, its absurdity was just that extreme.

And if it wasn't that extreme, then God help me because it would no longer be a lack of tolerance I possess. I'd just be cruel.

P.S., I'm just kidding Anthony you are very attractive. Hur hur hur. =D